Thoughts of a Toddler

There are many times during the day when Blair makes a facial expression that leaves me desperate to know just what thoughts are running through her curious, mischievous young mind.  Smiles, frowns, and everything in between seem to indicate many different emotions, and I would give anything to be able to understand what is happening underneath those blonde curls (no matter how fleeting each idea may be).  Therefore, I would like to ask for some assistance.  I am posting pictures below that show different looks and I will briefly describe what I assume my daughter is thinking.  Let me know if you think it's accurate.

"I am only ONE month old.  How many photographs is this crazy woman going to take of me?"

"This satsuma is a little larger than the rest.  It reminds me of my bald head." 

OR 

"I see a better one up there, but my dad is too short to get it."

"Could you please wipe the snot off my face before awkwardly lifting me up to take this photo?"

"I love my Gus Gus so much."

Gus the cat:  "She looked so sweet and innocent when they brought me home.  I suppose it's still a better option than euthanasia."

I honestly have no idea what she was thinking here.  She ran around Bellingrath Gardens making this expression for a while, but I have no knowledge of its origin.  Is she casting spells, breathing fire like a dragon, or just being odd like her mother?

"I'm so bored here that I would be more entertained watching my hair grow."

"It's funny that my dad is wasting time taking pictures before he goes to work because I'm fixing to dirty my diaper and make him late."

"My parents are terribly irresponsible for leaving me on this fence while they take a nap.  I don't even have on sunscreen!"

"OMG, my BFF is totes cray cray for that last Snapchat."

"I smile when I remember who my dad is."

"I LOVE YOGURT!"

"Wow, Evie, that really is a fascinating story about heroes!  Your life is so full of adventure!"

"Yo, Mom, why you holdin' that other baby?"

"All these other kids must have visually impaired parents if they chose these outfits.  As for me, I look good!"

"ZZzzzz....."

"Of course I eat them, Donavan.  Cold hot dog slices are a delicacy down here in south Alabama."

"Poppa is laughing right now, but he doesn't know I'm about to whack him in the back of the head with this shovel."

"It's Selfie Sunday!"

"LSWho?"

"This long haired redneck better not touch my cheese sticks."

"Thanks, Dad, for letting me help wash your truck.  Mom will be glad that you made me change clothes before playing with the water hose this time."

"I'm getting really close to walking and this place will never be the same once that starts!  Insert evil laugh."

OR

"I have gas."

"I hope he doesn't take me to the top of a skyscraper."

"I see my dad over there. He is super duper awesome.  I'm so blessed to have inherited his good looks."

"So, THIS is how I'm going to spend the evening?  With my weird shirtless cousin drinking Kool-Aid in an ice chest?  That's the third time this week!  Sigh..."

"They see me rollin', they hatin'."